Being a parent is all about learning, constantly. And as a mom of two and 3 years of parenting under my belt, I am excited to do things a little differently the second time around.
With a 3 year old and an almost one year old, I can already tell that I’ve become a different parent the second time around. Over the last 3 years, my Poppy has taught be so much about being a mom and parent. And the lessons keep on coming every day.
But looking at my Beany, who is turning 1 in just a few weeks, there are things I want to try to do differently with her. Things that I didn’t do the first time around with Poppy, not because I didn’t want to but because I went with my new-parent instincts. It’s funny how little you know the first time around. For some reason, no matter how much I read or was told by others, I still felt totally lost as a first time parent.
Looking back, I don’t have regrets because everything parenting choice I made with my first helped me grow and become a better parent. And I know that things won’t be perfect the second time around but at least I have a bit of experience under my belt and I’m excited to make a few changes.
With my second kiddo, Beany, I want to…
Stress Less At Mealtime
This is a hard one for me. With my first, I stressed a lot about making sure she was eating well and enough. Every meal time was a stress test for me. Will she eat this? Will she try that? Is she eating enough? I wont lie, I totally catered to her likes A LOT and was a short order cook just to get her to eat. In the end, it didn’t help her or me one bit. At the age of 3 she eats a pretty limited diet sticking to lean meats, carrots, cheese, carbs and fruit. And donuts… my girl loves her donuts 😂
With my Beany, I am working on letting go. I am responsible for offering my kid healthy food but she is ultimately responsible for eating it. I do not need to coerce her and she will not starve if she doesn’t eat dinner 2 nights in a row. This was hard for me to grasp with Poppy but it is something I am changing.
This has made food way more fun for my growing baby. There is less pressure for her and less pressure on me.
More Trust
It’s amazing how quickly kids can learn if you trust them. This is something I’ve learned quickly. I use to think that if my toddler didn’t learn something in a few days, then she just wasn’t old enough to learn it. False. Parenting is so much about trusting them. Kids are so much smarter than we give them credit for.
I’ve been so impressed with both my kids at how quickly they have learned to sleep through the night, learn house rules, pick up table manners, and follow routines.
Be Consistent
This is so key! And although I’ve heard and read it a million times, it’s much harder than it seems. Being consistent was difficult with my first born. Mainly because she was my first baby and sometimes I let things slide. Gave her a free pass because I felt bad for her.
With Beany, I’ve been much more consistent in routines and practices that seem the most valuable to me. This time around I know that consistency in parenting, no matter how hard or painful, does work in the long-run.
Do Less
Doing less is something I learned about when I was pregnant. I use to think my toddler had to be DOING something all the time and the source of entertainment had to be ME. Once I become pregnant with Beany, I started focusing on living and parenting a little slower. This meant doing less.
Both my toddler and now my baby have benefited from this so much! We still do fun things around the city, go on play dates and make plans but it’s not an everyday thing. My kiddos spend way more time just playing, being imaginative, going for walks to the park and living life a little slow. I hope to keep this up 😀
Go With The Flow
With my first, I had a daily schedule of activities and at times that schedule was pretty tight. But now with the craziness of having 2 kiddos and keeping up with work (blog, tennis, SPS Meals), I’ve had to be way more relaxed with our weekly schedule.
Yes, I still have an idea of things I want to do everyday, but if they don’t happen, that is A-OK. Sometimes my girls wake up super early or super late and plans don’t always work out. I’m learning to simply wing it sometimes. Life with kids is unpredictable and so far the best moments are the unplanned ones.
How has your parenting changed from one kid to another to another? Any major parenting tips for first time parents or even second time parents?
Originally posted 2018-07-25 21:12:04.
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