After a long 2018, we started this year with a new diagnosis, a new focus and a new normal. This is Real Life: Autism Diagnosis.
2018 was a long and challenging year in a lot of ways. It was the year we began to notice that our sweet 3 year old Poppy had some speech delays for her age. Nothing seemingly too major but definitely something that required a bit of speech therapy.
At the same time we were working though some fairly intense and frequent tantrums. Although well in the tantrum age of 3, her emotional meltdowns seemed severe to us and sometimes uncontrollable. The hubs and I found it almost impossible to console her a lot of the time. No matter what we did, didn’t do, talked to her, ignored the behavior, whatever, it didn’t help.
The worsening behavior coupled with some caring advice, pushed us to pursue some tests. On December 5, 2018 our sweet Poppy was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).
We kind of expected the diagnosis but kind of didn’t. I thought there was a small chance, but was in denial. She was so young and smart and sweet and learning so many new things at this age that I just thought things would come to her a little later. I didn’t see it.
Our initial reaction was being scared, half shocked, half expecting it, nervous, sad, angry yet also very relieved. Truthfully, after having struggled during countless of Poppy’s meltdowns, we were happy to know what was going on and actually try to help.
At the time (and still now) we didn’t know exactly what the diagnosis meant for her, her life and parenting in general. Our best way to deal with it was to take the information we knew and run with it. The hubs and I both threw ourselves to research and finding the best therapy options for our kid.
Everything happened so fast. One moment we were going into an appointment, the next we were researching therapy programs, dealing with insurance companies and making major family decisions not knowing much at all.
The diagnosis changed a lot of things for us, the biggest being the start of Applied Behavior Analysis Therapy (ABA). We started ABA a month after receiving her diagnosed, which was a near miracle based on the 6m-1yr wait lists. For that, we are so grateful!
Poppy has many goal as part of her personalized ABA therapy program. Three main goals being: to teach her the things she doesn’t know/facilitate those she struggles with, prepare her for school, and give her the tools to manage her emotions.
I won’t go into too much details about ABA Therapy right now because it is a pretty lengthy thing to sum up. Instead I hope to share our journey and experiences as a family going through ABA Therapy, later on.
When we decided to pursue ABA Therapy, we had no idea what it would really be like for Poppy and for our family. And unfortunately I wasn’t able to find any personal accounts of families going through something like this online. So my hope is to share our story to shed some light on the topic and help a family out there somewhere.
Fast forward 3 months later and here we are. Fully immersed in our new day to day normal.
Poppy’s days involve a lot of playing and learning. She truly loves her therapy team, all the play and all of the learning, but it’s still hard. She works so dang hard and we couldn’t be more proud. Those moments when she learns something new or gets it right are truly incredible for her and us. Then of course there are the moments of exasperation when she is tired and upset, yet still finds the motivation to try again. She is so strong.
Some days are challenging for her with little sleep at night, intense meltdowns during the day and a lot of frustration. Other days she is totally rocking it! Everyday is a fresh start.
As parents, we are still trying to find a rhythm too. We are not there yet. It is all very new for all of us. Learning to navigate the system, advocate for our kid, deal with the emotions, the new schedule, finding normal family time, and social time.
Personally, I’m doing my best to find a little more balance. Most days I’m in autopilot mode being involved in therapy, learning how to best help Poppy, and also doing the best I can for other baby Beany too.
At the same time, everyday is draining. As an introvert, having people in my house 40+ a week is something I am not use to. And even though I am so grateful for Poppy’s ABA team, it can be a lot.
As for our little 19 month old Beany, she is a little mini adult with her own opinion. She loves cleaning, dressing herself and doing everything her sister does. She loves playing with the therapists and being a part of everything. Seeing how much she loves and looks up to her big sister gives me so much joy as a mom.
For right now, this is what I know. Poppy’s cute quirks, her uniqueness and those amazing things that make her her, are the very things I love about her. Her diagnosis is important because it helps us learn how to give her the tools to be successful and lead the life she wants to lead.
And although I have no idea what the future looks like, I know our sweet little girl will have the life she wants for herself because no diagnosis will define or change how truly one of kind she is and how much she is loved.
Originally posted 2019-03-17 06:26:32.
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